"It's Easier To Leave Than To Be Left Behind..."

“It's easier to leave than to be left behind…” belted out the artist on the CD I was listening to the other day. At first I was singing along without giving much thought to the lyrics, but then it started to sink in that this simple statement is truer than I had every really taken time to admit. When I was in college I would enjoy going back home to visit my parents, but leaving to return to school was easy and painless for me as my trip and busy life occupied my thoughts. My departures, on the other hand, were extremely difficult for my mother to handle and she was often overcome with emotion as the car left the driveway. Even though I had taken part in many departures from loved ones to that point, I really hadn’t really put much thought into being left myself. But that soon changed as the day on the day after I graduated from college. My parents stayed at my apartment that weekend and soon it came time for them to head back home, and at that time I experienced the sadness that had plagued my mother on so many previous occasions. This time, I was the one standing in the door way waving goodbye as the vehicle pulled out of the driveway leaving me alone. On several occasions since that day, I have had to say goodbye to friends and relatives as they left my hometown to return to their homes, and one thing I can say is repeating the process has not made it any easier. And what about the times when we have to say the ultimate goodbye? As hard as death may be, isn’t it harder to be the one left here to grieve, often alone? To this point, I have been very fortunate in that I have not lost someone that I am close to, but having watched individuals in their grief I would have to say that the truthfulness of the lyrics are not limited to temporary goodbyes, but also include goodbyes that have more permanents. While I cannot dogmatically say that I understand why it is so hard to say goodbye and be left behind, I can say that I am glad to know that one day all tears will be wiped away and all goodbyes will be nothing more than a fading memory of the cruel reality that we had once called life. Until that day comes, I am sure more sadness will accompany goodbyes, but as I experience those low points, I am glad that I have some hope to cling to that such moments are not the end of it all, but rather they are just small steps en route to achieving the ultimate prize.